• fubarx@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    I watched as our little, barely walking toddler walked away from us in a busy department store. I followed behind, hiding behind racks, to see if he would get scared and turn around. Nope. Did not turn once. Just waddled away. I had to race and grab him from behind once he stepped onto the escalator.

    It was then that I really understood the need for those leashes. Had a talk with the wife and we decided against it, but it was close.

    • NewAgeOldPerson@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      🤣🤣🤣

      I’m sure it was very real moment for you. I hope, therefore, that it wasn’t too cruel of me to laugh very loudly at the whole situation. Kids are… Special.

  • But_my_mom_says_im_cool@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    There are kids with behavioural issues or kids on the spectrum, it doesn’t mean they or the parents are bad people. I never agreed with the kid leash and still don’t use it but after 3 years with an autistic toddler, I don’t blame anyone for using them. Would you rather that child be running lose or running circles around you? Don’t criticize people’s parenting, especially if you don’t know their situation or have never raised a special needs child.

  • EvilCartyen@feddit.dk
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    1 month ago

    So many people on this thread are defending leashes, yet they don’t exist anywhere but in the US, so…

    I have never ever seen a kid leash in Denmark or any country I have visited, and yet kids here don’t run around in stores acting out or disappearing.

    I don’t know, they seem dehumanizing and humiliating to me. If other countries can raise kids (incl kids on the spectrum) without them why can’t the US?

  • Miles O'Brien@startrek.website
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    1 month ago

    I’ve always felt weird about parents who have those backpack leashes for their kids, but now that I’ve been living next to my in-laws for a year, who have 8 children, I understand some of them.

    I refuse to take some their kids anywhere unless one of them is with my wife and I.

    One would absolutely go sprinting full speed away and hide from us just because he thinks it’s hilarious.

    Two would wander off because they saw something shiny and their brains are like an etch-a-sketches where every time a new thought enters, the old one has to get wiped away.

    One would do the exact opposite of anything we say just because he figures he can.

    And three others would absolutely just wander off, not because they want to but just because kids aren’t always the best at spatial awareness and simply get too far away. And would be terrified if they noticed their adults were nowhere in sight.

    • CoolMatt@lemmy.ca
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      1 month ago

      My mom would just walk away as if she didn’t even have a kid with her. The panic and fear of losing my mom and having to find her again in a huge ass grocery store is what eventually kept me close from some point on

    • ayyy@sh.itjust.works
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      1 month ago

      Having that many children is child abuse. There’s no way they all get the parental attention they need.

      • Miles O'Brien@startrek.website
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        1 month ago

        Oh completely 100% agreed, and neglect isn’t the only form of child abuse going on but CPS has visited them plenty of times and interviewed all the kids and neighbors (before we moved in) over custody battles with some adopted ones. (they’re all related, long story with too many identifying details but some parents died and all the children are cousins and siblings) so they at least aren’t doing anything that CPS cares about.

        But holy shit I have never wanted to curb stomp my sister in law a-la American History X more than when I went over one day and I could hear screaming halfway down the 1/4mi driveway, and when I walked in she was in the 6 year Olds face screaming at the top of her lungs about how she’s tired of telling the 6 year old to put her shoes away, four of the kids were slowly doing chores in the living room and kitchen with tears running down their faces, and I could hear the 13 year old sobbing upstairs. Their mother screamed so hard and long that she burst a blood vessel in her eye and detached the retina. As usual though the moment she saw me she stopped and pretended like she wasn’t doing anything.

        Since then I’ve had my phone on record in my pocket whenever I’m coming over unannounced just in case I can catch it. Bare minimum it will be something to show the courts when one of the kids becomes a serial killer.

        Their dad is no help, he’s an enabler and honestly a broken shell of a person when it comes to his wife.

        Grandparents are worse than parents.

        My wife watches them whenever she can, and takes them on surprise day trips to get away from their parents and some of the siblings when possible but holy shit they do not make it easy to take them anywhere.

        I don’t regret marrying my wife but I can honestly say my in-laws are insane and anyone could understand why I hate them.

        Uhhhhhhh what was the topic again? Sorry for the vent.

        • ayyy@sh.itjust.works
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          1 month ago

          Thank you for sharing your story. The child abusers downvoting us need to see the gritty reality.

  • jjmoldy@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    My parents sucked but I’m grateful they at least didn’t leash me like a dog. They degraded me enough already.

    • Yeather@lemmy.ca
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      1 month ago

      My brother was leashed, but he would also run into traffic and chase animals if you let him.

    • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Do you remember Harambe?!!! Harambe died for your pride! If that boy was in a leasg he would still be here and the world would be a better place. /s but not really?!

      Seriously now, leashing a kid is not a bad thing. Young kids will run faster than light and human parents can avoid accidents, make sure the kid is is around.and shop without losing their minds. Let’s normalize it. If you use a necklace, is that a collar? No. Leave moms alone

  • Annoyed_🦀 @lemmy.zip
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    1 month ago

    ITT: people who doesn’t have kids, doesn’t interact with kids, or doesn’t have to raise a particularly difficult kids, talks about raising kids.

    OOP sounds like an insufferable person tbh.

  • grue@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    People are alluding to it, but not attributing the blame correctly: the “need” to leash kids is yet another negative consequence of car-dependent urban design.

    • Kaboom@reddthat.com
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      1 month ago

      The fuck are you on about? Have you never had a kid disappear on you in a mall? There’s no cars there

      • grue@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Multiple people in the thread are talking about using them because of worries about a kid running out into traffic.

        Quit pretending that a statement has to apply 100% of the time in every possible circumstance in order to be generally true.

      • ameancow@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        It was a disconnected and incoherent thought, but I’ll give it a pass because in America we really do seem to be doing everything possible to make our neighborhoods as lethal as possible.

        As for leaches on children, I guess it’s they’re used in some medical cases like reattached limbs that need blood-flow, but leaches are kind of gross and don’t serve much good besides those few examples, so I don’t know why we’re trying to use them again on children in particular.

  • jawa22@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 month ago

    I remember being on one of those. They were fairly common in the 80s. I also deserved it because I was a little shit that would sprint away at the first opportunity in the grocery store.

  • Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    We tried that with my son. Nothing worked. We could zip tie the closures and he would be out of it in minutes. He was a runner from age three to around seven years old. The school was happy when he wanted boot and we bought him some woody boots. He couldn’t run as fast. OP there is a POS. He hasn’t lived it and lacks the empathy to understand.

  • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Are chained kids particularly difficult to raise, more so than before (and than kids in any other culture besides the one that puts leashes on their kids…)? Were people doing this 100 years ago in America, for instance? Or is it yet another example of social decay, that parents can’t even discipline/raise their kids well enough to allow them outside without leashes?

    • ameancow@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      This isn’t an issue, it’s used by some parents with very small children in busy areas like amusement parks or if they have special needs, but hardly anyone actually cares outside of comedy skits. Nobody actually feels shame or anything. It’s played up for laughs.

      There’s like 20% of every Lemmy/Reddit post about things like this from people who are thinking WAY too hard about things.

    • Obscura@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      What an ignorant comment. There’s evidence to suggest walking attachment devices for young children were used way back in the 17th century. It’s possible that similar things were used earlier than that too. An early version of the modern one we are all familiar with now, started selling in the 1920s. Incidentally, use of it skyrocketed as more and more cars, faster cars and busier roads spread across the modern world.

      And another thing, use of these leashes is common for parents of kids with disabilities. I have to use one with my son because his learning difficulties mean that he doesn’t understand danger and if he gets frightened/overwhelmed he will often run away in a panic.

      I don’t like using it but I would rather have my disabled son safe and alive than not use it, and judgemental attitudes like this are the reason that I have to put up with unsolicited, nasty comments when I take him out in public; when I’m already dealing with the stress of keeping a child with extra supervisory needs safe and well.

      • bandwidthcrisis@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        My autistic son would happily play in the park. Just once every few months he would decide that “now is the time to run” and just take off as fast as he could in a straight line. How would that play out in a busy street.

        People can’t imagine that: so much of the time things are calm, straightforward to handle, but if EVER you let your guard down for a second at the wrong time, you’ll end up on the news as a “tragic story of grieving negligent parent.”

    • Stovetop@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      I think it’s more the fact that kids weren’t really brought to busy markets/stores 100 years ago, nor were there busy streets full of cars everywhere. They stayed home or just in the local environment, and typically mom would also stay home to watch them and make sure they stayed out of trouble.

    • Sibbo@sopuli.xyz
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      1 month ago

      Kids are incapable of resisting their urge to do something to a certain degree at certain ages. Like suddenly running onto the street for example. Some kids just do this, and then your only option to keep them safe is a leash.

      • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        I literally have never seen a kid on a leash IRL (I’m not American) nor heard anyone say “goddamn this kid is so hard to raise, lemme put him on a leash”. Never seen a pic of my gramps on a leash, or a history book showing leashed kids. Through millennia kids have been properly raised without leashes. So, I ask again, is this not just another example of how incompetent people have gotten at being people in some areas of the world?

        • ameancow@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          It’s barely a thing. Some parents with special-needs kids or parents with a lot to juggle in places like amusement parks sometimes use leashes or backpack-leads to keep their very young kids close, but nobody actually cares much, nobody is actually shamed, nobody laughs and points, nobody gives it a second glance.

          This is the kind of thing that’s played up for laughs or memed about because it’s objectively a funny concept depending on context, but don’t get lost down the rabbit-hole of internet users overthinking every goddamn thing and making everything into an issue.

    • ch00f@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Or is it yet another example of social decay, that parents can’t even discipline/raise their kids well enough to allow them outside without leashes?

      From what I’ve heard, the expectations of behavior for children in public spaces has gotten a lot more strict. People generally have very little patience for your kid’s antics. Also fewer mothers are dedicated homemakers, and when time and energy are tight, a leash might be a good bandaid.

  • ameancow@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    I’m all in favor of using unconventional methods for health and safety, but really outside of a few special cases like improving blood-flow in reattached limbs or other body parts, I’m not sure why we’re trying to put leaches on children, it seems like a bad idea, but I guess if you just keep leaches as pets and don’t have another blood source for them, maybe just ask your kids first. Smh.

  • Estradiol Enjoyer @lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 month ago

    I saw this disturbingly often when I worked retail, like maybe once a month? too often. Anyway, I’m pretty sure it’s a surefire way to make the adult the kid grows up into a puppyboy/girl/enby. I just don’t see how it could ever not. I think this started with gen z actually, I saw a kid or two when I was younger with leashes on. Would love to see if this has been studied at all.