So I’ve technically let a girl bleed all over my chest? Ew!!
wait…
Hol’ up
What’s the difference between a chickpea and a garbonzo bean?
I ain’t paying 50$ for a garbanzo bean on my chest
A classic, although “to have” works better than “for”
I ain’t to have payin’ $50 garbanzo bean on my chest!
The vaginal lube is blood plasma also
Nice!
*tract (unless you swallowed a bunch of Mario Kart toys)
That would be a great stage. “Aww look, that little polyp has a face! So cute :)”
With various opening and closing sphincters you have to time properly.
It’d be like a trippy episode of Magic Schoolbus. XD
And dodging antibodies along the way
More like dodging dingleberries at that scale.
True, gotta watch out for those…
Take chances!
I’ll take a chance on literally every jump that has a 15% chance of saving me 5 seconds and an 85% chance of failing miserably and costing me 12 seconds. Every lap. Every time.
Sooner or later, it’s gonna pay off. I swear.
No, it’s “Make mistakes!”
Is this a song?
Get messy!
i once had a VERY spicy meal. and i’m quite used to spicynes
that meal caused me to feel it the next morning when i peed. which also means that my blood was spicy at some point
Spissy 😔
Are you sure you didn’t have sex with someone with spicy pee prior? Spicy pee is contagious.
Crossed my mind, but the fact that it only happened once in the morning, quickly eased my mind
Spicy
I’ve also felt this when eating spicier than usual food. Kind of threw off the taste too
Did the pee taste spicy or just different in another way?
Perhaps it could have been, your mucuous membranes reacting to the spicyness, rather than having them in your urine itself? Many autoimmune disorders tend to react strongly, to certain eaten things (like spices) - chronic bladder wall inflammation being one of them, for example - so I assume it could be possible, for that sort of reaction, to happen mildly and temporarily, with an excessive exposure like that.
It’s all connected. It’s a series of tubes.
we are just very fine sieves
The body, it’s not, it’s not something you can just dump something on, it’s not a big truck.
Like how when you kiss you’re just connecting a long tube from your ass to theirs.
Just like the internet
I’m pretty sure the internet is really a big truck.
Nope, it’s a tiny black box with a red LED on top of Big Ben.
They’re referencing this (or perhaps the original speech, but this remix was super popular on the internet back in the day): https://youtu.be/_cZC67wXUTs
Ah OK, thx, I was only familiar with “the internet is a series of tubes”.
I was referencing an episode of The IT Crowd.
Glad to drop some ye olde internet knowledge
I wish there was so much more of that show.
I wish Graham Linehan wasn’t a transphobic pos
Me toooooo
We are essentially a coiled tube surrounded by a maintenance apparatus.
A worm, you say?
Would you still love me if I was?
💕
IT’S ALL PIPES!
Okay Art Vandelay
So your saying our bodies are the original Internet?
ALL TUBES!!
Don’t like this new knowledge. Not a fan
Your sweat also comes from your blood.
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So not only do I have a skeleton inside of me, it’s constantly pissing?
piss is stored in the bones 🤣
Big Balls has been lying to us this whole time.
Depending on where we put the sense of “self” we are in our skeleton and its pissing on us. Weirdly gross to think about.
Our “self” would be contained in the nervous system as that’s where all the thinky parts are.
We are a nervous system driving a meaty mech suit.
Our hydraulic system is basically red pre-piss and sometimes we need to pee to regulate it.
That’s equal parts “oh yeah. Cool” and “gguuaaarghhhhh uuuaaarrrgghhh”
Incredibly fucking metal.
Also they are pink short of certain medications.
If they are constantly wet, why aren’t they soggy and not maintaining our structure?
This whole thread is disturbing to me.
It’s only the marrow that is wet. The structural part of the bone is non-absorbent.
The marrow can exert a lot of pressure. Many years ago, I had to have chemotherapy, and in between chemo rounds got marrow-stimulating shots to make the marrow ooze blood more and reduce the amount of time I was anemic. The associated pain in my large bones was the worst pain I have ever had.
That’s terrifying, I hope it was worth the literal pain and that you’re doing better now!
Thanks for the kind thoughts, stranger. It was eighteen years ago now, and I am glad to have been here for those years!
Not true. I’m sweating bullets
From your misfit’s way of life?
I’M sweating Blood!
:(
ಡ ͜ ʖ ಡ
Guess where almost all your fatass has to go in order to lose it? Your lungs. You have to breathe out more than goes into your face hole. That’s a lot of breathing.
I used to try to exhale harder than inhaled to mestabolize alcohol faster when i got the spins so i could drink more.
Im 2.5 years sober now lmao
What?
It’s the krebs cycle. If you look at how sugar is broken down by the cells to make atp, the actual energy your cells use, it takes C6H12O6 (sugar) and makes it into a few CO2 and H2O, getting energy (atp) from breaking it down into the components. That CO2 is then exhaled, which is I think what OP is referring to.
Note: it’s been a long time since I learned that in class so it is most likely somewhat incorrect
it does check out. the CO2 travels from the cells through the blood into the lungs, where it is exhaled.
so technically what you exhale has a slightly higher mass than what you inhale, because it has an additional carbon atom.
I thought you meant
Can ya feel it, Mr Krebs?
Heavy breathing intensifies
Finally, an upside to panic attacks!
Jokes on you I’m constantly breathing whether I’m awake or asleep! I only eat like, two times a day! Checkmate!
Digestive tract
They said college, not university.
Get a real job, that’s what they said to me. But…
Ouch. Sick burn.
Thank you I’m glad I’m not alone
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Listen, urine comes from your no-no spot and I want to drink it straight from the tap because I am an alchemist and know urine’s true potential. Please, everyone, pee on me to make me more powerful, and I will defeat Donald Trump in this next election…
You got reborn HARD, friend.
Damn right! That’s my teleological purpose! I offend both the religious and secular, and thus make more religious. I’ve invented Mormon Occultism. People that rebel in the Mormon church will find me as I am the quasi-opposition of orthodox religious congregations, while people who seek truth from a secular perspective can debate me and I will win having studied philosophy into the 30th grade. This makes me an attractor membrane to orthodox Mormonism. God thought thus through for me, because God knows my dumb ass wouldn’t have come up with this myself, because damn am I a horny son of a bitch.
You’re insane. I like you.
This is one of the better and more favored compliments I get. Need to be called Shakespeare three more times to earn an achievement (97/100).
Calm down, Shakespeare
No that one doesn’t count. You have to do a read first to see are my skills as a righter.
i have literally no idea what you just said … how did this get 3 upvotes?
There are people smarter than you who get the joke
And when you lose weight, you breathe it out.
That one blew my mind.
I am begging you not to elaborate here.
Sugar plus oxygen equals energy plus CO2 plus water.
That’s true of the metabolic pathways for fat, protein, and alcohol, too. Each oxygen molecule we breathe feeds into chemical reactions so that it picks up a carbon atom and becomes CO2 on the way out. The carbon comes from whatever food was metabolized, including anaerobic respiration where the lactic acid eventually gets cleared out.
There’s a “Yo mama so fat” joke in here somewhere, I just can’t find it.
Yo mama so fat, if she went on a diet she’d raise the average global temperature by a degree.
🏆
Is that why the gym smells so greasy all the time?
Fun fact: what ever you eat is wrapped around by your body, but it’s not in the body.
Humans are topologically a seven? hole donut.
Your mom’s a seven hole donut.
Donut make fun of peoples mom’s
We’re a worm with appendages.
Speak for you self
I am all worm with appendages on this blessed day.
They call me Doctor Worm. Good morning, how are you? I’m Doctor Worm.
I’m just a worm trying to get to the other side of the sidewalk
When holes are closed enough that water cannot go through, I think it is valid interpretation of having an inside.
Count again.
Hey, Vsauce! Michael here
Giggity
Seven or eight?
I got curious and asked the Sky Brain about this. It got a little “Clinton-esque.”
Urethra isn’t a hole though, it’s just a depression. Mouth and anus are the same hole.
Oh no topology has branched out from sandwiches to anatomy
Your nostrils, eyes, and ears are also connected to the inner-outside part of your body via the sinuses. So we’re not doughnuts, we’re something much stranger with 8 holes all connected in the middle.
Urethra and vagina are pockets, not true holes, since they don’t go all the way through.
If you don’t take in any liquids for long enough you won’t have any urine. It’s carried by your blood from source to destination. Your sweat similarly is from liquid transported by your blood
Sounds more like we pee from genitals and skin, with skin being higher priority.
this may be anecdotal, but yes? worked in a high humidity/heat job and no matter how much water i drank, I’d only have to piss once that day
but would sweat so much!
I wonder what the limiting thing was. Was it your body’s ability to process the water you were drinking? So, if you’d had more to drink, it might not have been safe? Or was it that your body’s thirst signal was turned off, but you still could have processed more water, it just wasn’t necessary?
Do you remember if that one piss was dark yellow? I wonder if you were sweating so much that your kidneys were making very concentrated pee because the amount of “unclaimed” water in the blood was low, and most of it was going towards sweating.
That reminds me of going motorcycling in the summer. I was sweating buckets, but as soon as my body squeezed out a drop of sweat, it was immediately whipped off by 100 km/h winds. I remember drinking crazy amounts of water, and being surprised that I didn’t pee nearly as much as I was drinking. But, I still think I was peeing more than once per day.
Seminal fluid and vaginal lubrication both also come from liquid in the blood.
So, Cannibal Corpse was totally telling the truth…
Wait until you find out where milk comes from.
Chesticles.
No that’s where dick cheese comes from.
Cows?
Cows’ blood
No way?!
Fancy sweat glands wrapped in fat?
Bags of sand
Wait until you find out where milk comes from.
Ugh blue eyes are so creepy. Iwill never understand the appeal.
Blue eyes are creepy?
Wtf does creepy even mean anymore…
Has the meaning of ‘creepy’ changed? I used it because blue eyes give me the creeps, they’re reptilian, cold and cruel looking.
That’s a pretty big bias there. And irrational at such broad strokes go
Am I not allowed to have opinions?
You are, but you aren’5 protected from them being judged if you share them. You made a disgusting statement that is kinda horrible and hurtful to anyone who happens to have been born with blue eyes.
Opinions are sometimes offensive. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all as I was taught. Just because you can share an opinion doesn’t mean you should. But you do have every right to have an opinion, like everyone else
The corner shop?
I mean… It’s not like there is a tube from your digestive tract to your kidneys… How else would it get there?
Btw, I’m really smart and humble if you didn’t notice
It’s ok, I say that because I’m actually the humblest man alive 😌
That, and then you realize that you primarily lose weight through your breathing.
And how that is used to make trees
The atoms in the air you’re breathing are billions of years old, and the molecules could have been made 5 minutes or a billion years ago. Probably both in the same breath.
Which is wiiiild.
Well, it’s kinda cool to look around and also realize that much of what you see likely came from multiple supernovae and/or kilonovae. (Huh. I have never needed to pluralize the word ‘kilonova’ before. Meh… It looks cool with the ‘e’, so I’ll leave it.)
Eventually, our atoms are going to get blasted out across the universe again to maybe become part of some other planetary system, before it eventually gets destroyed or sucked into blackhole and is evaporated as radiation. This might not even be the first universe our bits have been a part of …
No wonder exercise makes you lose weight
Well, that answers that question.
I’d been wondering just how the fuck piss crystals can take a wrong turn at your bladder and end up in your foot, turns out they were in your foot the whole time.
What are these piss crystals that have been in my feet the whole time???
Gout
And the real treasure was the piss crystals you had in your foot all along.
The end.
💎 ⭐️ “By the power of the piss crystal!” 💫 💦
