My last partner used to just cheerfully say ‘Get out of my house.’ which worked well enough.

My coworkers boyfriend is iconic in my eyes:
When he feels like he socialized enough he just says goodbye and goes to his workshop. In his own home. He just leaves them then and there and they figure it the rest.

I think that’s hilarious and awesome :D

But you don’t actually hear out at that point, that’s just the time you start to reckon whether you outa.

In Canada, especially in the rural parts, it is a ceremony that lasts on average about one hour and takes place from the kitchen table / living room couch to the end of the driveway. And there is a 20% chance that the farewell may be cancelled and the visitor invited to stay for supper or to spend the night, where the ritual will be repeated again the next day.

As a visitor, it helps to be an introvert, so I can pick up the signals long before it becomes a thing. My excuse to leave usually is something about having to get up early for work. Understandable and convenient.

As for being the host with that problem… well, that’s my secret. Don’t host. :p

In the South we sometimes use “Well… Let me let you go…”

It’s the good old Irish exit for me. Even if I was the host.

This is how you get out of a social situation in England too, except you say “well”.

There are so many ways to do this all over the world!

How about

“We really should do this again sometime!” - but then both parties immediately notice that was slightly too forward and everybody makes an awkward dance to express “I didn’t mean to throw you out” and “No offense taken, really” …
Whatever the reasons, it always takes substantial time from the initial communication 'til the final closing of the front door and a heaved sigh on both sides of it.

I’m poly and a pack type, so I usually just prefer that the people I’m with stay forever.

But if they aren’t my people and I have to get up early and do stuff without them, I’ll usually start talking about needing to go to bed soon to do a thing, and talk about that thing if I feel comfortable with them knowing. Usually steers things quickly.

If it was my parents or something, I would probably go with the “welp, it’s getting to be about that time. It was great seeing you.” Or “we should do this more often” Etc.

The slapping of the knee and the “Welp!” is just the start of the goodbye ritual. It only takes another hour, (sometimes longer), for the guest to actually go away. Since all parties will stand and visit in the home and then visit all the way to the car as everyone very slowly makes their way to the vehicle.

Once the guest actually gets into the car, you can then begin the final 30+ minute ritual of the leaving. And as the guests finally leave, the hosts must follow them down the driveway waving until the guests are out of sight.

(This is the abbreviated version)

Be friends enough with people to tell them to fuck off before they give you a hug and leave just yo hang out again 20 years later

It’s what I do with all my friends

Some found it offensive how unfiltered I speak, and left, and that’s fine. If I couldn’t speak plainly around my friends I think I’d go insane.

My goto as a Midwesterner is, "Well, I’ll get out of your hair. "

Easy…

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphony_No._45_(Haydn)

Haydn’s patron Nikolaus I, Prince Esterházy was resident, together with all his musicians and retinue, at his favorite summer palace at Eszterháza in rural Hungary. The stay there had been longer than expected, and most of the musicians had been forced to leave their wives back at home in Eisenstadt, about a day’s journey away. Longing to return, the musicians appealed to their Kapellmeister for help. The diplomatic Haydn, instead of making a direct appeal, put his request into the music of the symphony: during the final adagio each musician stops playing, snuffs out the candle on his music stand, and leaves in turn, so that at the end, there are just two muted violins left (played by Haydn himself and his concertmaster, Luigi Tomasini). Esterházy seems to have understood the message: the court returned to Eisenstadt the day following the performance.

Okay but if we’re talking about Midwesterners, they’re not leaving yet. There’s gonna be another 20 minutes of conversation while everyone is standing, then they’ll head over to the door for another 20 minutes conversation, once the door is open they’ll stand on the front porch and talk for another 20 minutes.