Tell her that her nose looks too perfect, problem solved
Exactly. They fumbled hard. “It has to be your ____, there’s no way it turned out that good naturally.”
My autistic ass would be like “Nope no clue sorry, whatever it was, they a good surgeon 👍”
Neurotypical here - that’s the correct response.
ADHD here, it’s one of two. The other is to guess bottom surgery/sex reassignment to teach her what sort of prizes she can expect from playing stupid games. Yeah you’re burning that bridge, but that’s a bridge worth burning
Madlad
smh could have guessed she was born with a tail, missed opportunity
If I was born with a tail and found out my parents had it removed I’d be mad as hell.
Labia reduction
“You seemed like a person who would have a wizard’s sleeve situation down there.”
“Wtf it was my ears”
“So is the situation down there not fixed or what do you mean?”
leanbeefpatty
Context?
So what does the ab goddess has to do with this surgery?
Exactly what I meant with my question.
Just a play on words. Labia reduction = lean “beef”
“Did they do work on your face to make you less cute? Because I think they botched it.”
“Your nose is your cutest feature, that’s why I chose it” is the correct response
“Not like those ugly-ass ears. They really screwed those up, huh?”
Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is really fucked up.
(this one is so stupid and obviously inappropriate that I laugh each time I imagine someone saying it)
“It looks perfect! That’s why I thought you had work done!”
I want to get whatever Jeff bezos had done so that my face looks like it’s going to explode when I talk
“You had a concerning mole removed from your thigh”
“Honestly? You look so naturally beautiful I couldn’t begin to guess. But if I had to, I’d say your most captivating thing about you is your eyes. Are they the real deal or someone fashion them from starlight?”
You should write for Hallmark movies.
idk i’m just going to pull the “dont know don’t care, card.” lol
“They must have clipped off your wings, because you look like an angel.”
Since when was Anakin Skywalker on lemmy?
vomits
“Or like some sort of succubus devil thing, I dunno.”
Did it hurt, when they clipped your wings and you took 1000d6 falling damage, m’lady?
“Your boobs?”
“My boobs?!”
“Yeah, they look greeeeeeeat” *deliver as Tony the Tiger*Insist, not to pick something then. You can easily explain that it’s a lose-lose: either something is wrong with a natural body part or they didn’t do a good job. And both of you feel bad afterwards.
Do the following:
First, say something along the lines of: “That is very difficult. On the one hand, you are so astonishingly beautiful that all features of you could be made by a master craftsman. On the other hand, as I am a person of faith, you could also be just God’s most perfect creation.
Either way, would you excuse me a second while I go to refresh in the bathroom?”Then you sneak out of the bathroom window because by the glorious lord Satan himself, you do not want to be in a relationship with someone who insists you do something after you refuse
“that is very difficult, one the one hand you are so astonishingly beautiful that all features of you could be made by a master craftsmanship, on the other hand, as I am a person of faith, you could also be just God’s most perfect creation.
Either way, would you excuse me a second while I go to refresh in the bathroom?”
Better answer: Don’t put up with toxic games
Exactly. Nothing wrong with a “Nuh uh. I’m not falling for this. You can tell me if you want me to know.”
she clearly wants you to compliment her natural features, play along citizen.
How would anyone be supposed to know that?
Also isn’t asking for compliments generally a bad thing?
Which is why she isn’t directly asking for them.
