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ZeroCool@slrpnk.net to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 5 months ago

Trump To Victims’ Families: ‘I’m Doing Everything Possible To Resegregate Flight Schools’

theonion.com

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Trump To Victims’ Families: ‘I’m Doing Everything Possible To Resegregate Flight Schools’

theonion.com

ZeroCool@slrpnk.net to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 5 months ago
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WASHINGTON—Pledging to restore racial purity to the nation’s aviation programs, President Donald Trump assured the families of American Eagle Flight 5342 victims on Friday that he was doing everything possible to resegregate flight schools. “You have my promise that I’m working around the clock to make sure our beautiful Caucasian pilots—who are just trying to […]
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  • JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    5 months ago

    I swear to God if I have to double check the community icon one more time

  • IHeartBadCode@fedia.io
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    5 months ago

    Pledging to restore racial purity to the nation’s aviation programs

    I thought The Onion was satirical.

    • unalivejoy@lemm.ee
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      5 months ago

      Reporting the actual news since 2016

      • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 months ago

        It’s America’s Finest News Source

  • Critical_Thinker@lemm.ee
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    5 months ago

    Jesus christ, this is the onion?

    I was fucking sure it had to be true. It’s his fucking MO.

    • CitizenKong@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      Nah, never. He doesn’t know the word “resegregate”.

      • schnurrito@discuss.tchncs.de
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        5 months ago

        The article doesn’t have him use that word, it’s the Onion’s choice of word.

        • lennivelkant@discuss.tchncs.de
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          5 months ago

          The article title quotes him as using it

  • Mak'@pawb.social
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    5 months ago

    Jesus Christ, Onion. Stop being so damned close to reality…

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      5 months ago

      An unfortunate side effect of living in the most bizarre timeline 🤷

    • theneverfox@pawb.social
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      5 months ago

      Hey, it’s not the onions fault. Reality has been doing it’s best to turn them into a news site

  • LGTM@discuss.tchncs.de
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    5 months ago

    I shouldn’t have had to check the community

  • spooky2092@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    5 months ago

    Goddamned onion is back to posting real news

    • mavu@discuss.tchncs.de
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      5 months ago

      This is really a hard time for them, I barely raised an eyebrow before I even noticed it was the onion.

  • aeronmelon@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Are there any long-term health risks associated with eating so many onions as of late?

    • jaybone@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      If you’re a cat, I think it’s bad for your kidneys/liver.

  • Philharmonic3@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    I hope the orange shit stain kills himself, or is dead soon

  • molave@reddthat.com
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    5 months ago

    Thank God it’s The Onion

  • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    That man is a total jeenius! Go ahead try to find resegregate in a dicksionary. Can’t? Why? Because he is a thinking man. He is the most thinking that anyone man has ever thinked before. That’s why he knows the definition of such complex words and the rest of us just think it could be two words. It could be Reseg Regate! Regate sounds like rebate so I think Trump wants to lower flight costs so we can all fly too!

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