On this episode of “Qwerty processes through their (her?) gender related existential crisis”…

Not going to post this on c/traa because honestly I don’t feel confident in calling myself a trans woman yet, so here on c/chat it’ll go!

“The bra thing” is a pretty damn good gender litmus test, so I mustered up enough confidence to grab one of the bras from the Family Dollar down the street. And then did the classic “stuff socks into the bra” trick.

The physical sensation and pressure around my chest and upper back just… Feels kinda nice. Honestly to any cis male autists out there, I recommend giving it a shot! (Although presumably you’d want to wear a tighter tank-top or something instead.)

I was low key afraid of looking at myself in the mirror. The first few glances my subconscious went “Oh! That’s a woman!” which felt neat.

Again, I managed to compose myself, and I took a proper look at myself in the mirror.

Yeah bras make someone look distinctly more feminine. Not “Boop! That’s a woman now!”, but yeah the signal processing in the subconscious definitely checks if someone has boobs. (Idk why I’m stating the last part, I already kinda knew that.)

And then I kinda did that soft chuckling thing, and brought the tips of my fingers over my mouth. And then the inside of my chest felt lighter.

I like it! I… I really like it!

My question now is: WHY DIDN’T I EXPLORE THIS SOONER?

And I think the answer is that, there was no immediate need. I didn’t really feel dysphoric or stuff, there was no blatant in-your-face “You REALLY need to figure yourself out!” signs.

  • peeonyou [he/him]@hexbear.netEnglish
    8·
    2 days ago

    i bought a whole ass lingerie thingy on a whim a number of years back… it started because somehow a woman’s pair of panties ended up in my laundry from the laundromat which I didn’t know until I was home folding everything, and they actually looked like they’d fit me. so i tried them on and damn, it felt good. then i shaved my whole body which also felt good. then i went all out and got two whole lingerie sets from the porn shop and wore those from time to time… felt good too. Then the novelty of it all just wore off and i just tossed it all in the trash and haven’t really had any desire to do it again since. For a very short and very intense time i was convinced i wanted to be a woman… this was closer to 20 years ago tho and it wasn’t something i’d ever really been exposed to so i didn’t feel comfortable talking about it to anyone so i never did, but looking back i’m glad i experimented, even though it ultimately wasn’t what i wanted.

  • ashinadash [she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
    12·
    2 days ago

    so I mustered up enough confidence to grab one of the bras from the Family Dollar down the street.

    Congrats on being exceptionally brave, took me months to buy underwear at all. Also congrats on finally exploring, which always rules imo.

    ⓘ Remember to enable JPEG-XL support in your browser, even on your phone!

  • Moomoo_Milk [she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
    5·
    2 days ago

    Enjoy the exploration of your gender. It’s certainly a wild but fun time for some.

    If you do eventually start wearing them often, consider getting stuff without underwire. Underwire is the devil.

  • scrungus [comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
    5·
    2 days ago

    lets-fucking-go That’s so awesome, congrats! I hope you keep figuring out new and fun ways to be yourself!

    And I wholeheartedly agree with tactical_trans_karen, c/traa is really helpful for this kind of stuff if you want to use it. I felt similarly out of place or reluctant to post there at first, but everyone is super nice and accepting. The comm has been a real help for me, and I hope if you need it you’ll feel comfortable using it whenever you want meow-shark