I was born in Victorian Britain and have a very mirthful air about me.
So one day I was going about my merry business, being my jovial self.
When I’m walked a creature that saw what I was about, smoked at me and said ‘well aren’t you the gayest person I’ve met all day’.
I’m not sure how to feel tbh
Drink from a straw. Wear shorts.
I’ve had a colleague say that tea is “homo water”. I’m aro/ace, but most of my colleagues don’t know that. Similarly a straight colleague of mine got mocked for wearing pink (but not feminine) shoes. After some of these incidents we’ve kinda started pushing back against this nonsense by deliberately triggering these people and calling them out, which has worked so far.
Being gay doesn’t mean someone is somehow less masculine, which is the heart of what the “homo water” idiot is implying.
Was the British Empire, upon which the sun never set, somehow not masculine enough? One could argue it ran on tea. Morally questionable, absolutely, but not manly enough?
Were the samurai somehow compromised in their masculinity because they drank tea, sometimes in elaborate ceremonies?
And, apart from tea, were the Sacred Band, the elite warriors who died to a man fighting Alexander the Great’s dad, somehow less manly because they were all gay?
I bet this colleague of yours also thinks straws are gay in this parlance, as if it’s somehow more manly to put one’s lips on the same glass rims touched by hundreds of others. I guess hygiene is not masculine or heterosexual.
And the thing is, even my rant here is problematic because it spawns from a lifetime of people equating gay with not being enough of a man, an attitude that infects my own thinking.
Shit, the most feminine of men is more of a man than these idiots if he stands up for his identity unapologetically.
Yeah this is kinda a point. People like this colleague seem to have gotten stuck in a highschool bully mindset ans never moved on. All of their jokes are about people who are different, their whole status seems to be based on their “masculinity”. In my experience this is the largest portion of homo/transphobes here in the Netherlands. People who aren’t violent or outright hateful, but rather just pushing outdated jokes and viewpoints and then getting annoyed by all the “woke bullshit” when they get called out.
My tactic so far is to not fully attack back, but rather staying friendly while showing my disappointment with this behaviour unless it goes too far. Most of these people are otherwise decent, and in my opinion may be swayed by someone “woke” who doesn’t go “full crazy sjw” but does call them out. Making a joke about minorities is way easier of you don’t know anyone well from those groups. They’re not crazy Trump voters, so they may still be steered in the right direction
tea is homo water
The entire nations of Iran, England, and China would like to know the location of this little bitch
To anyone who thinks tea isn’t for cishet men I have four words:
Tea. Earl Grey. Hot.
😳😳 Hey, I’m a cishet man but thinking about joining jean-luc for some tea, earl grey, hot, really gives me the vapors.
Q also joined for some tea.
It’s a tie between licking ice cream and saying something is adorable.
Around 2010ish I was thoroughly enjoying some Bells Two Hearted and other IPAs. My brother (2 years older) tried arguing that bud light is man’s beer, and my beers were fruity and girly. It certainly doesn’t matter to me, but the irony of choosing bud light, out of all the macro beers, is just 👨🍳😘>
- Wear orange or pink.
- Eat quiche
- Like poetry
- Hang out with girls at recess
- Wear an earring
- Owning Laurie Anderson or Philip Glass CDs
Orange? Wait until Dutch football fans hear that. Would make NL during a Euro Cup or World Cup an absolutely ✨ fabulous ✨place xD
Quiche is amazing. Who doesn’t like eggs and ham/bacon? Hanging out with gurls, well yeah nothing straight about that…
Once I was at a hotel bar with colleagues and we were hanging out in some lounge area. The waitress asked if we wanted drinks, so I ordered a margarita.
Then they made fun of me for it. Like, what the hell does it matter what drink I have.
eat a chicken sandwich. Apparently straight men have to eat burgers.
Cry.
okay, i’m gay, but this is still relevant.
my dad (who i haven’t come out to yet) thinks colourful underwear is gay, and those are his remarks to seeing that i’ve packed both red and blue undies while we were on vacation last year.
like bro they’re just colours.
When you’ll finally go outta closet he’ll be like: told ya, knew that from the start cuz of the gay underwear xD
Haven’t come out to him yet but you were ready to come out to the whole internet ? I don’t want to shame you but man come on grow some balls 😉
to be clear, i’ve been out to the rest of my family for a long time, and i am very open about my sexuality (even irl, which takes at least some balls because i’m not in a very lgbt-friendly region). the reason i am not out to my father is that he has always been a traditional “man of the house” person, and i am not driving a wedge in our relationship by letting him know that his ideal bloodline ends with me.
if you don’t understand the cultural contexts in which i reside, do not assume my intentions or degrade my decisions.
The one and only thing was the way I held my wrists/hands when I was younger/into my teens. What’s super weird is it was my dad who brought it up and mentioned it a lot but he is super supportive of lgbtq+ that’s the weird thing to me.
Dance. In a troupe full of girls. Honestly, it was me and 15-20 girls.
Other boys literally called me gay for dancing, while they went and played whatever sports they did and then all went into a locker room and showered together etc.
I honestly never understood how they thought dance was gay. I don’t understand it now.
Spending hours with a bunch of ladies and possibly touching them in intimate locations.
vs
Spending hours with a bunch of guys and possibly touching them in intimate locations. Then showing with them.
Yeah, dance is way gayer.
Wearing an earring in your right ear, but it’s ok to wear it in the left… Or the other way around. I could never remember which.
When I was a kid, the saying (here in the UK) was “right ear, right queer”.
Don’t wear it solely on the leftApparently I got it wrong, sorry for giving you the gay
I hope you’re happy. Bro is now getting pounded in the ass bc of you
Playing tennis.
In jr high I had some friends who played football say my other friends and I on the tennis team were gay for playing tennis.
I had to point out to them that the tennis team was co-ed and we regularly made out with our female teammates on the long bus rides to tournaments.
While those on the football team were constantly manhandling each other, showering together and slapping each other on the ass to say “good game.” But the tennis team are the gay ones?
They got mad, but dropped it.
Listening to music.
I was playing some music on my cassette player at school one day, but it wasn’t rock’n’roll according to the renowned expert that was discussing the situation with me, therefore it was “gay”.
