What about “here is how you’ll be safer, how you’ll lead a nicer life, yes a safer and nicer life is possible” is victim blaming. I’m not blaming you for being fucked up, I’m encouraging you to fix it. If that offends you then you have deeper issues than assholes existing in the world.
It’s not your fault that society is fucked up, that interpersonal alienation is rampant, that people wear masks so heavy that they lose the capacity to see other people’s masks, but it would be your fault if it stays that way because the one you wear is your responsibility.
I don’t need to fix anything because I am not the problem. Historically, systemically and individually I am not the problem. I will continue to go about my life with my eyes wide open with risk assessment. I’m happy for you that you’re safe but I’m sad that you don’t seem able to listen to what all the women (and some men) in these comments are saying.
I will continue to go about my life with my eyes wide open with risk assessment.
It was you who asked, and I quote:
How can you tell which is which when they’re all dressed as men?
Which means you do have (not “are”) a problem: You can’t distinguish assholes from non-assholes. Or how else am I to interpret that question?
You asked for advise about the topic. I pointed you into directions and now somehow I’m the bad guy? I’m the asshole for providing you with information you, specifically, asked for? You’re accusing me of not listening to you because I answered your question?
If you want emotional support, ask for emotional support, don’t ask for solutions. I actually thought male-female relationships had evolved past that particular point of misunderstanding but it seems they haven’t.
When your response is “if in doubt, ask a man you trust” and women have shit threat radars, “tickling”.
Those are not solutions.
I wasn’t asking for solutions or emotional support.
Quick recap for you:
“How can you tell which is which when they’re all dressed as men?”
And then you responded withpatronising incorrect victim blaming bullshit 👏👏👏
You’re basically advocating the missing stair which is all kinda of fucked up. But also! Evidently men don’t know which one of you are risk factors - many of you don’t even see a risk.
It was a rhetorical question for reasons that you can’t or won’t understand.
Granted. They’re mere pointers in the right direction. Have you ever considered asking your brother, or a trusted colleague, about another man’s character? You’d be surprised how open and forthcoming the answer will be.
But also! Evidently men don’t know which one of you are risk factors - many of you don’t even see a risk.
Based on what evidence? Have you actually seeked that information, or are you assuming?
It was a rhetorical question for reasons that you can’t or won’t understand.
I understand the reason to be a function of your psychology. You were seeking reinforcement in your belief that it is justifiable to distrust all men.
Enough. Women are supposed to have a man they trust on hand at all times to check if each man they encounter is safe to respond to freely? A chaperone who knows all these random men on the street who harass?
Like it’s all fine because men can recommend a friend.
You don’t comprehend my original point and subsequently you’re not really responding to it. That’s fine, you carry on but I realise you’re either a troll or completely naive or just being obtuse. cba anymore. Have a good day.
Women are supposed to have a man they trust on hand at all times
That’s a completely new sentence.
You’re perfectly free to, I in fact encouraged it a million times in this thread, to unfuck your own threat radar. You can do that on your own, you can do it with help from others, either sex, only people I’d advise to stay away from are a) women who have a history of getting into abusive relationships or are abusers themselves and b) men you don’t trust, and, generally, c) neurotic people. Take the judgements of people other than those, compare and contrast them with your and other people’s judgements, compare reasoning and what specifically people are pointing out about the person in question, collect data. Given enough of that your own capacities will unlock.
I said “if in doubt”. That is, if you are not sure of your own capacity to judge, a trusted man is going to be a way out of that situation because have you ever looked at violent crime statistics? How the vast majority of victims are men? We have plenty of reason to develop good threat radars. Don’t think for a second my neck hairs don’t stand on end when meeting a character like Andrew Tate in the street: Insecure, irritable, full of himself yet constantly seeking approval, a ticking time bomb on first sight. These two guys? Complete opposite. Sure you don’t want to fuck with them but I don’t want to, anyway, so that’s a nothingburger.
What about “here is how you’ll be safer, how you’ll lead a nicer life, yes a safer and nicer life is possible” is victim blaming. I’m not blaming you for being fucked up, I’m encouraging you to fix it. If that offends you then you have deeper issues than assholes existing in the world.
It’s not your fault that society is fucked up, that interpersonal alienation is rampant, that people wear masks so heavy that they lose the capacity to see other people’s masks, but it would be your fault if it stays that way because the one you wear is your responsibility.
I don’t need to fix anything because I am not the problem. Historically, systemically and individually I am not the problem. I will continue to go about my life with my eyes wide open with risk assessment. I’m happy for you that you’re safe but I’m sad that you don’t seem able to listen to what all the women (and some men) in these comments are saying.
It was you who asked, and I quote:
Which means you do have (not “are”) a problem: You can’t distinguish assholes from non-assholes. Or how else am I to interpret that question?
You asked for advise about the topic. I pointed you into directions and now somehow I’m the bad guy? I’m the asshole for providing you with information you, specifically, asked for? You’re accusing me of not listening to you because I answered your question?
If you want emotional support, ask for emotional support, don’t ask for solutions. I actually thought male-female relationships had evolved past that particular point of misunderstanding but it seems they haven’t.
When your response is “if in doubt, ask a man you trust” and women have shit threat radars, “tickling”. Those are not solutions.
I wasn’t asking for solutions or emotional support.
Quick recap for you: “How can you tell which is which when they’re all dressed as men?” And then you responded withpatronising incorrect victim blaming bullshit 👏👏👏 You’re basically advocating the missing stair which is all kinda of fucked up. But also! Evidently men don’t know which one of you are risk factors - many of you don’t even see a risk.
It was a rhetorical question for reasons that you can’t or won’t understand.
Granted. They’re mere pointers in the right direction. Have you ever considered asking your brother, or a trusted colleague, about another man’s character? You’d be surprised how open and forthcoming the answer will be.
Based on what evidence? Have you actually seeked that information, or are you assuming?
I understand the reason to be a function of your psychology. You were seeking reinforcement in your belief that it is justifiable to distrust all men.
Enough. Women are supposed to have a man they trust on hand at all times to check if each man they encounter is safe to respond to freely? A chaperone who knows all these random men on the street who harass? Like it’s all fine because men can recommend a friend.
You don’t comprehend my original point and subsequently you’re not really responding to it. That’s fine, you carry on but I realise you’re either a troll or completely naive or just being obtuse. cba anymore. Have a good day.
That’s a completely new sentence.
You’re perfectly free to, I in fact encouraged it a million times in this thread, to unfuck your own threat radar. You can do that on your own, you can do it with help from others, either sex, only people I’d advise to stay away from are a) women who have a history of getting into abusive relationships or are abusers themselves and b) men you don’t trust, and, generally, c) neurotic people. Take the judgements of people other than those, compare and contrast them with your and other people’s judgements, compare reasoning and what specifically people are pointing out about the person in question, collect data. Given enough of that your own capacities will unlock.
I said “if in doubt”. That is, if you are not sure of your own capacity to judge, a trusted man is going to be a way out of that situation because have you ever looked at violent crime statistics? How the vast majority of victims are men? We have plenty of reason to develop good threat radars. Don’t think for a second my neck hairs don’t stand on end when meeting a character like Andrew Tate in the street: Insecure, irritable, full of himself yet constantly seeking approval, a ticking time bomb on first sight. These two guys? Complete opposite. Sure you don’t want to fuck with them but I don’t want to, anyway, so that’s a nothingburger.