Put on some halfway decent headphones and try out the virtual barbershop.

I love sitting neck-deep in an outdoor hot tub on a cold day!

One time in high school, I heard somebody yell “Steve, you [bundle of sticks], stop talking to your girlfriend and let’s go!” and Steve was in fact at the time talking to his girlfriend.

The sheer concentration of cognitive dissonance has stuck with me to this day.

We’re doing the extra-silly speedthrough right now. Next time will be much more comprehensible.

Instructions unclear. Got God diagnosed with lead poisoning

Well, that certainly explains the platypus!

This is the whole “if humans were going to have wings we’d have to redesign the whole organism from the ground up” fiasco all over again.

Well, you just gotta only allow one archetype per team, figure out a system for the players to draft their choice fairly, and then let the chips fall where they may.

By Odin’s beard, I wish that animated series set in 3008 could have worked out.

Colorado River toad: ₍𝄐 ̫͡ 𝄐₎

Humanity: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Oh, I’ve got fucking Cold urticaria. My body takes it personally if I go swimming in cold water, or don’t wear a heavy sweatshirt on a chilly day, or God forbid if my sheets are just a little bit cold and I’m not wearing wrist-to-ankle pajamas. It fucking sucks, and it didn’t even develop until I was in my thirties, so it’s not as if this something that I learned to live with so early that it’s second nature to me now. FUCK my fucking cold-activated histamines.

Treat your taste kindly with KENT, the cigarette with the NEW Micronite filter!

^^Micronite ^^is ^^asbestos.

Oxbow

And the Carolina Squat!

I thought that was the sort of thing that the government mandated companies had to do in a controlled and transparent fashion. I wouldn’t have thought that the NTSB would allow a vehicle to be registered without a thoroughly vetted crash testing procedure.

I needed a white karate gi for a Street Fighter Halloween costume, so I went to the local school and bought one, and while I was at it I bought a black one too, in case I ever wanted to be a ninja. Then I started wearing the black karate pants as pajamas.

That was over twenty years ago. Those same black karate pants are still my favorite pajamas. In-fucking-credible.

“Nurse said that if I were a good lad that I should receive a lolly!”

I didn’t see nothin’.

And carrying cast iron cookware across the entire damn continent.

Sorry