fake: anon is athletic. gay: doesn’t go out on a date with a girl
Well, obviously gay. He preferred impressing the boys over the girls.
Real and straight.
Anon didn’t have sex.
Straight? Anon didn’t miss because he didn’t want to have sex with a woman.
Fake: Anon is attracted to girls and any girl is attracted to Annon
Gay: Anon is very gay
Circular reasoning fallacy
circular nut sucking is gay thus anon is gay
I will appeal to the authority of deez nuts
This is the kind of clueless shit I would’ve done back in college. I can’t dunk, but I was just as good as anon at being completely oblivious.
It would have been the first dunk Ive made all day and I would be chuffed as fuck I made it. Only 10 years later j would have realised I fucked up
Anon is strong and independent, he doesn’t need to appear clumsy to attract sympathy.
OK, I put a lot of thought into this, and here’s what I’ve concluded.
When the girls came up to anon and suggested the bet, he should have said: “Sorry, ladies, I can’t take that bet. See, whenever I do something, I give it 100%. So when I’m on the court, I’m being true and faithful to the sport of basketball. And the one thing I can’t do…” (he locks eyes with the girl he likes) “…the ONE thing I can’t do is be unfaithful.” (he gives his best boyish grin, then goes and makes the dunk.)
That’s way too wordy.
Go make the dunk. Give her a moment of disappointment, then come back and say. “I don’t miss dunks, or dates. How about [local restaurant] at 6?”
Then you 1. Don’t miss a dunk in front of the boys and show your principles. 2. Get the date. 3. Let her save face - you’re not going on a date with her because you lost a bet, but rather because you like her.
You forgot the “tips fedora” part.
It’s equally as likely as the original greentext story
deleted by creator
“And if I make it, she has to take me on a date”
spoiler
Your partner should be happy to see you succeed. Subjecting yourself to failure in order to please someone, particularly a trifling-ass rando, is denial and devaluation of the self. Tell her to miss a dunk and see how she handles it. Worst case scenario, she dunks so hard that you end up pregnant. Is it worth the gamble? Not for me to answer, that’s between you and god.
Anon avoids double embarrassment of missing a dunk and having the girls go “SIKE”
oh anon
He should have refused to elaborate.
Dunk
Maintain eye contact
High-five the boys
Walk away
This one made me wince
fumbled because of excess swag
