The night I met my fiancee, we were both working in the same building. It was just a chance meeting, we made smalltalk for a bit, and then went back to work. About 10 minutes after she took the elevator to the next floor, I went to the other end of the building, and took the other elevator up a floor, hoping to “casually” catch her to chat some more. When the doors opened, she was right there. That’ll be five years ago in two weeks
How did you spark it up though? I would’ve been like “how’s your day” or some basic shit like that.
The comments on this are weird. Dude had a crush and talked to her. She must have invited him to things and now they’re married. Everyone talking like he wore her down or wouldn’t have stopped if she was disinterested.
Dudes do be creepy, though, but let’s just leave this story be, ok.
It’s easy to misread as stalker/abuser behavior, as it’s worded simply and without context, and something like 40% of women will have to deal with a stalker at some point in their life.
There’s a big difference between “I had a crush on her, she invited me to a thing and her friends liked me and now we’re married” and “I wrote down the times this girl got out of work and when she went to the gym so that I could follow her and hit on her there, and then I infiltrated her group of friends with the intent of getting closer to her” but it’s easy to accidentally make the first sound like the second unintentionally - especially when people are primed to watch out for the second.
Exactly! My partner did this to me and it worked. How else were they meant to, dunno, begin existing in the life of the other party, aka stop being a stranger?
Maybe she married him for the tax benefits. Dunno, she might still not be into him…best he hedge his bets…
It’s cute because they ended up together. If they didn’t end up together this would read as a stalker story
Unless he realized she wasn’t interested and left her alone after that! That’s the normal, healthy thing to do!
People seem to forget that’s the normal thing to happen.
This always reminds me of a comic I saw a long time ago. Two girls are gossiping and one talks about this guy that smiled at her (like packing her groceries or something) and she said he was creepy and stalking her. The next few frames show those same girls recognizing a guy sitting in a dark car watching them through the window and gush about how cute he is and it’s so sweet that he is so into one of them. I can never find the comic… but yeah, it’s all down to how the other party feels.
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It’s unsettling how common that sort of story is, and it’s always something of a boast, too. “I never gave up! I ate dinner at the diner she worked in every night until she agreed to go on a date with me, and now we’re married!” Even as a “success” story, it’s not exactly great to think that the only reason they are together is because one partner “wore down” the other.
Dude is probably good looking so it doesn’t count as stalking
Edit: guess I’m showing my age and people don’t remember this video
What matters is the signals she gave him and how he read and responded to them.
If she gave signals of “please leave me alone” then whether he’s creepy or not depends on how he responded, regardless of how he looks.
Him being a positive and personable presence near her over a stretch of time, especially if she gave signals of being in the neutral-to-positive range towards him, is fine. The most important thing is that if he eventually shot his shot - and the response was “no thank you” - that he accept this answer gracefully.
Lots of women actually prefer to meet guys through their social circle because it’s an easier way to meet guys who their friends can give their own impressions about and who are less likely to be assholes. It sounds like it turned out well here, although we’re missing a lot of information.
Not gonna read that novel because it was a joke my man
There are plenty of traditionally good looking men, and women, who are considered to be creepy. It takes slightly longer for people to acknowledge it but it absolutely happens. There are also many people who are “neutral” where their attitude flavours their looks. If they’re creepy they’re sleezy and if they’re respectful they’re put together.
To be honest the “ugly” people I know who’d be considered creepy very quickly a) are being creepy and b) haven’t even attempted to make themselves presentable.
Stop being an incel
I showed this to my wife and she said “Quit following me everywhere, you creep!”
“Good morning Julia.”
