I happen to be a scaleless snake expert, as a result of my extensive experience.

The trick with hairless snakes is you have to keep them warm. Too little heat, and this guy will go completely rigid.

Imagine an icicle made of blood, with a snake built around it. That’s your hairless snake with too little heat.

Beyond that’s its basic hairless snake stuff: clothing, thermal tattoos, an endless supply of hairless rats, and little snakeweights to help them stay buff.

It’s not easy raising these special creatures, but it’s very rewarding once you get over the unmitigable horror of feeling them crawl around your shoulders, and their habit of whispering as you shudder.

Because of their lack of scales, they’re unable to vocalize, and hence they speak in a hoarse whisper.

The beast rests on a bed of wood chunks

So an electric blanket

He looks more conscious somehow. I think I’ve got mammalian in-group bias. He just looks like more of a little bro than a regular snake does.

Like a dog that got turned into a snake and is now like wut

There is a way. Just mix it with equal parts hard liquor.

Nothing about the phrase “more evolved” implies a “straight path” of evolution

Just met the girl

Less evolved as in the product of less evolution. There is such a thing as more and less because more happens over time.

I’ve noticed when I eat mcdonalds my heart races afterward

hehe 420

Well, I guess it’s time to choose between

• The childish notion that everyone you disagree with is a fascist
• Your relationship with your son

I really, really hope you’ve got the guts to admit you’ve been juicing on hyperbole.

I assume your decanter is transparent?

Lots of people assume Jim Beam whiskey got its name from some fellow names James Beam. But actually it’s a reference to its dual nature: the beverage can exist as both a liquid and an electromagnetic wave.

This is why Jim Beam is so cheap. They want to get it off the shelves before it disappears via Hawking radiation.

Your whiskey didn’t actually disappear. It changed.

And if someone tells me they’re unable to distinguish between making a promise and having their rights violated, I’d be ending that relationship too.

So like … work? Legislators would have to work?

You have no conception of how contracts work do you?

Contracts involve things people aren’t entitled to all the time. Nobody is entitled to have someone else meet them for lunch at 1 pm either. You can’t dictate someone else’s movements that way.

Oh wait! Unless they agreed to meet you there at 1pm.

Fascinating, the way promises can turn a lack of entitlement into legitimate entitlement.

Yeah indentured servitude as punishment for being victim of a cheater. That’s just pure injustice and the state shouldn’t be enforcing that.

Abby-something

I haven’t been banned for this yet.

Yeah they’re assholes, but it’s the sick who need a doctor

These guys are wrong. It was a black lives matter official.