I use noscript and ads don’t load unless I whitelist them. Videos won’t autoplay unless I whitelist them. I am the internet’s bouncer

I would have preferred a ‘will it blend’ format with the ultimate test being the Cybertruck’s own keyfob (you have one job!)

Man youtubers are dumb as hell. Use a stick or something

I never open a video where 3 or less paragraphs of text would suffice. I feel like we’re heading back to drawing things on the walls of caves

So, in other words, the boss has nothing to complain about

Next stop: advertisers pushing product placement into generative images, and generative images with product placement littering image searches. It’s a pandora’s box we can’t close

Not only monetization but also the whole sorting/ranking algorithms. Youtube is a bit better than Facebook reels and instagram due to the thumbs down button, but some people go out of their way to make nonsensical garbage because viewers will then comment, and there’s no way to tell if a video is good or bad based solely on engagement. Those videos where people have some DIY hack to clean a toilet bowl and they just pour random condiments in the toilet for 3 minutes and cut the video before any conclusion, those types of videos

On a more positive note if they lose their teeth they might have less luck at reproduction. Problem fixes itself, fingers crossed

I wouldn’t want to see how someone would react after going through something like that. Sounds like a supervillain origin story or some shit. “Jokes on you, it was a simulation! Now grab your stuff, you are free to go!”

That thing is one bathroom away from becoming a 240,000 dollar tiny house

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Lets all scavenge old tech and run vms with Win7 on a ramdisk to deal with all the vulnerabilities

I was thinking Diablo 2 is gonna be rendered unplayable. It’ll probably view “IL” in “SKILL” or a rune or small charm as a pause symbol and make it so you can’t open your inventory

Edit: Oh shit, the ‘II’ in Diablo II

It’s not planned obsolescence but something remarkably similar. They can be made for cheaper, go to shit eventually, then they wind up in a landfill while the consumer buys yet another. All wrapped up in slick marketing.

There used to be dip switches on some older machines (386/486 era), eventually ‘turbo buttons’ that accomplished the same thing, toggling would cut the clock speed so older software would be compatible with clock speed. Those turbo buttons were more a ‘valet mode’ than anything, but it all died out before the Pentium/Athlon era to say the least

Next up: printer ink??

It’s being investigated as a criminal incident in order to rule out criminality despite Chao making a phone call and explaining that she accidentally threw it in reverse, meanwhile if us normal folk call in a break in cops are like ‘just come in and file a report so we can throw in the trash can alongside the rape kits’

Hold up, is that a shorty Vitamix canister? Easily worth 10

You don’t need to be superman to rob a bank tho

Amazon UI is so bad if you type ‘subs’ in the product search it auto-suggests ‘subscriptions on my account’ and a dozen ‘subscribe and save’ variations because people wind up using the product search trying to find that stuff.