• 10 Posts
  • 94 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: July 4th, 2023

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  • Sure, this applies most of the time. My big rendering workstation and Asus laptop run Mint so flawlessly, I was kicking myself for not trying this sooner. My brand new Dell G16 7630 has been a special kind of hell with over two months of forum diving. The keyboard backlight is being a crackhead. The video drivers are a chaotic mess that I’m wary of updating lest my machine completely freezes/bricks for the ~20th time, necessitating a Timeshift.

    So, yeah, Linux is great, but that is not everyone’s experience. For me, it’s only fully usable 66% of the time. I’m still going at it, but those are shitty numbers. We FOSS evangelists need to acknowledge that usability, end-user support, and compatibility are an utter shitshow for the average schmuck. Also, this meme is glowing radioactive evidence of the toxicity undermining the FOSS movement.

    When we start taking ownership of all that AND fixing the experience, then we can finally have the Year of Linux on the Desktop. Or we can sit here, say “hurr durr, look at stupid end-user,” and wonder why normies refuse to switch to Linux.






  • I’m in my mid-50s and have struggled my whole life with crushing depression, paralyzing anxiety, and a pretty bad case of barely-medicated ADHD. I’m also just a person on the internet rather than your mental health professional, so these are barely guidelines. They are, however, decent guidelines on staying healthy and motivated longer.

    As @ProbablyBaysean@lemmy.ca said: absolutely stabilize your sleep. The technical term for it is “sleep hygiene.” Find what works and that is your sacred ritual. Sleep hygiene takes lots of different shapes for everyone. For example, mine are:

    • a super consistent sleep schedule of 7.5 hours
    • same time to bed and wake every day, even weekends
    • completely dark, cool room
    • sunrise alarm clock
    • no screens an hour before bedtime, unless it’s to read a book

    You’ll need to find your own rhythms and what works. Don’t discount afternoon naps.

    Ditto ProbablyBayesean’s suggestions on exercise and nutrition. We who struggle with mental health are utterly sick of hearing that, but in 100% of my travels, experiences, and social circle, it applies. We humans are evolved to move, a lot. And rest a lot. Even if it is just going for walks. A walk outside does wonders. So many people discount the restorative effects of a hard workout with a corollary recovery period.

    Also, pay close attention to the effects of any foods on your mental state. You need to find out what that is for you. For example, most western diets, especially the Standard American Diet, are skewed towards Omega-6 and -9 EFAs, with too little Omega-3. The deleterious effects of this imbalance are well studied (ref: “Hacking of the American Mind” and “Sugar” by Robert Lustig, an endocrinologist). I called out EFAs, but it really applies to everything you put in your face. The difference in, say, a pastured-raised chicken vs a CAFO chicken are like… why these even called the same thing?!

    Lustig also goes into great depth on the neurochemical differences between happiness and contentment (again underscoring ProbablyBayesean). It’s important to identify the differences and their effects on your brain. Modern society absolutely tweaks our brains to equate happiness with contentment. This is doubly hard for people who have been abused, especially if chronically abused. They are not the same, and it becomes especially clear when one reads about the neurological differences.

    I’ll add one more that works for me and is a common exercise for a lot of mood dysregulation disorders: keep a gratitude journal. Write in it every morning, even just five minutes. Doesn’t have to be a lot, doesn’t have to be fancy. The gratitude exercise has something about the brain being unable to hold gratitude at the same time as negative emotions. But, for reasons I haven’t bothered to look into, it does need to be written. I initially tried keeping mine in digital format and things just didn’t stick. My bullshitspiration is there is some mind-body connection that occurs when handwriting out the entries. I find there is an added bump in my contentment in writing with my favorite pen (had it for 44 years) and using a notebook with really nice paper. But maybe I’m just weird like that.

    Finally, but critically: meditation. I wish I learned earlier. I dismissed it as woo BS for far too long. It’s like a workout for your brain. There are tons of woo and non-woo resources on how to meditate. To start out, you only need a quiet place to sit for less than five minutes. Hand-in-hand with meditation is mindfulness: being in this moment. It’s hard, but it gets easier with practice. Again, so much of modern society is always trying to steal your focus and attention. You can practice mindfulness anywhere, any time. For example, brushing your teeth. Try being in the moment, noticing how the toothbrush feels in your mouth, how the toothpaste tastes, the sounds. And mindfulness grows from there. You suddenly find lots of things you do wherein you were acting mindlessly (in the psychology context).

    Hope that helps.

    Edit to add: get down pat your daily dances and rhythms. For example, maybe Thursday night is your laundry day. Solidify that, and it’s now your weekly ritual. Maybe you like the look of a clean kitchen in the morning (don’t underestimate how much dirty/cluttered spaces tax your brain); clean the kitchen after dinner. Your daily kit and life maintenance should be muscle memory; these are the critical tasks to your day-to-day life and you should be able to do them blind and with a broken leg*. Shit like your wallet, keys, and phone, grabbing the lunch you packed, morning stretches, evening physical therapy exercises… These dances and rhythms might not keep depression from rising up, like it do. But having all that shit be daily muscle memory keeps a bout of depression from becoming a deeper hole from which you must extricate yourself.

    *Not an exaggeration. People who crew on my boat have to be able to find the radio, EPIRB, their PFD, and maneuver around the first aid kit. We all drill that blindfolded with an alternating leg tied up.


  • Anecdote: (a little background) I don’t typically deal with narcissistic people; I’m not troubled by narcissists in my life. My tech life is pretty well locked down, but it could always be better (working on it). And my YouTube suggestions are tightly, carefully curated to topics pertinent to my professional and personal projects.

    I had an utter piece of shit contractor working for me on a project; he was a grifting, conniving, manipulative shitbag. When I outright fired his ass, he first got all self-righteous then tried to play the victim, but I wasn’t playing any of his games. My phone was sitting on the workbench next to me.

    The next day, I opened YouTube because an engineer I know told me he dropped a new video on software we recently discussed. There among my suggestions were a bunch of videos on how to deal with narcissists. So somehow, in only talking with the contractor (he doesn’t use email, text, or other electronic communications), YouTube decided I was curious about dealing with narcissism. I’m morbidly curious how YouTube made that decision, and whether it was audio or “we know you’re associating with this guy who we identify as a problematic narcissist and here are some resources.”

    Now, I’m just some douchecanoe on the internet and you should probably dismiss me based on that alone. But GODDAMN, the data points sure do pile up quickly on how deeply we’re being surveilled.



  • Our stoned faves:

    • Mario Kart 8
    • Watch “Stop Making Sense”
    • Painting party - get a giant canvas and paint a cohesive image together
    • Leftover Voltron - try to come up with the tastiest, most novel, most colorful food combos from the grazing spread that was set out
    • Guess that candy flavor - blind taste test Skittles, gummy bears, etc, and correctly guess which color
    • Current event punchlines - get into a serious analysis on a topic, then summarize or come up with a hilarious metaphor for what you described