I too enjoy repeating the joke I just saw but removing all of the distracting humor.

!Offbeat@lemmy.ca has you covered!

You’d need an afternoon nap too if you ate two Big Macs, two Fillet-O-Fish, and a chocolate shake for lunch every day.

And just in case anyone thinks that may have changed since that news originally came out in 2017… It hasn’t. He was still getting McDonald’s delivered to court every day as recently as last October.

In other words, they produced a typical pre-campaign book, where the first rule is to do no harm. Somewhat unusually for the genre, that book, 2022’s Not My First Rodeo: Lessons from the Heartland, landed the South Dakota governor on the New York Times’ bestseller list, adding to the consensus that the Donald Trump devotee had a big future in GOP politics.

What it didn’t do, of course, was spark a weeklong news cycle — and a round of obituaries for that same political future — by including a tale about Noem leading a 14-month-old wirehaired pointer named Cricket to a gravel pit and shooting him to death after he ruined a pheasant hunt and killed a neighbor’s chickens.

This time around, Noem has a different team in place, as well as a different imprint, Hachette’s conservative-leaning Center Street. And the folks behind her new book, No Going Back, didn’t get in the way of sharing memories about gunning down an ill-trained puppy.

Kirsti Noem’s publisher in 2022: “This is a horrible story. We can’t include this, Dick Cheney only got away with his hunting trip scandal because he shot a lawyer and not a puppy.”

Kristi Noem’s new Conservative publisher in 2024: “People will be impressed with how tough you are on puppy crime.”

Lol of course she won’t. That would require far more integrity and courage than anyone left in the GOP possesses.

“The risk of dying from heat stroke is just WOKE propaganda!” - Ron DeSantis, probably

No but they did sort out the whistleblower problem - twice!

Tim Scott is a gutless hack who apparently hasn’t had enough of being embarrassed on the national stage yet. It doesn’t matter what you do or say Sen. Scott, Trump’s not going to pick you because it would upset his base. And we all know why.

I’m sure you thought you just made an excellent point.

Yeah there’s no practical way to manage thousands of browser tabs in your workflow, that’s just digital hoarding.

Okay so you clearly do not know what the words specific and literal mean. Got it.

They actually didn’t “specifically” say that. At all. Until editing their comment an hour after being called out.

Lol yep. It cracks me up when people think just because they aren’t going to one extreme or the other with their speculation that they aren’t still engaging in wild speculation. That’s not how it works.

“There’s no information yet so I’m going to make up an explanation which is the most likely scenario given that there’s no information yet.”

Brilliant.