How thoughtful of them to ensure that the deceased would have something to put up their butt in the underworld.

And there is some green coloration on it, indicating the dildo was once painted to look like a cucumber. Derek Smalls gets it.

If I start to salivate in sympathetic parallel to the imagined hungry dogs, does that count?

And then I start to drool!

Tumblr goths, ffs.

My headcanon is that he tried the more technical and correct explanation, but most people he told it to started to go a bit glassy-eyed during that part, so he simplified his pitch.

The batteries things was also Morpheus’s explanation, and not necessarily a definitive fact of the fictive universe. Morpheus could have been talking out of his ass, or deliberately over-simplifying for the benefit of Neo, who he knew was kind of a dumbass.

…Why?

I assume that this thought experiment posits a space filled with the same average density of particles found at ground level on Earth. Obviously such a thing is nonsensical, but it serves to illuminate one aspect of the raw power of the Sun that we ignore, because we’re insulated from it by 93 million miles of vacuum.

Saganumenousness.

It always staggers me when I remember that for roughly sixty million years during the Carboniferous Period, there were trees but no microorganisms capable of decomposing them.

Just sixty million years of branches falling off and trees falling down and… just sitting there on the ground, not rotting at all.

Calvi and Hobbolas.

This meme is classist. The spices are for the aristocracy, and for trade with more culinarily refined cultures. They are not for the smallfolk!

Thanks buddy, I really appreciate it.

The roll inside the suitcase was what he used to bind her with, and was discarded with the clothes torn off her. He later used a different roll to bind the suitcase.

Acting like a confused old person in the least helpful ways possible is always fun. I would sometimes do this with telemarketers who called. I’d adopt a doddering old woman persona, who would say “ehh?” and ask them to repeat things over and over again, and when they asked her for information I’d go “let me look for that”, put the phone down, and then go make a bunch of loud noise as if I fell down.

It’s more like “Pippin accidentally nukes Rivendell.”

At the very least, OP, dumping garbage by the road is against the law, so even if it’s just regular garbage, you are reporting a crime regardless. Bonus: a cop has to deal with someone else’s garbage.

Maybe he or someone he loves was molested by a duck. It’s been known to happen.