“Yes comrade, that’s right. He’s telling us that the country is ovverrun with woke transexual alien criminals that are eating all of the household pets. Yes…yes I tried asking for the nuclear codes, but he just started rampbling about a radical lesbian liberal agenda and now he’s talking about China and hamberders. Comrade, he won’t stop talking about Nancy Pelosi and Obama and now I think he’s trying to sell me his ugly golden sneakers…”
I think the guys that dug the trenches have all melted by now.
“Why do none of our prisoners have eyebrows?”
I love how Russia invading other countries is always everyone else’s fault. Hilarious.
Russia pushed Ukraine into seeking NATO membership when they attacked them in 2014. Ukraine was neutral before that.
Why doesn’t Russia just go home? Why is it up to Ukraine to do anything but defend itself?
I think we’d all shit your pants.
I appreciate out-of-the-box thinking in a survival situation, but why the fuck did he drink out of his boot? Jesus bro, just cup your hands.
Go eat a bushel of dicks, Russia.
Yes, it’s the past tense of mistake.
I’m pretty sure paying for sex is a crime, at least in most places in the U.S.
So, the same flavor as my dog’s farts.
“Say…what’s a mountain goat doing way up here in a cloud bank?”
“Welcome to the Biden-Trump presidential debat…and it’s over. Goodnight, folks.”
Imagine the gate agent having to tell the passengers why their flight is canceled.
He tried to poop out an entire airplane.
Just breathe bro, you’re overthinking everything. I used to feel like this, too, it’ll get easier.
Make some eye contact when you’re talking to the person you’re with. You don’t have to stare, but enough to show that you’re listening/ engaged.
Don’t be afraid to be awkward. Embrace it. Try to have fun.
Why do you say that?
You aren’t stupid for asking a question. Asking questions is why smart people know things.