Really, the doctor would probably not see anything recognisable, and ask the patient if they think they are making it up, or if they’re a woman, that its their period.
Yeah. Stop pretending the healthcare system has the resources to deal with unknown diseases.
If they can’t find a diagnosis, you’ll get told that you’re probably anxious or depressed, or malingering, and get told to exercise and eat healthy. This is what I was told when I was literally bedridden for a year by an undiagnosed neurological disease.
It’s a pretty horrible position to be in. My disease which is relatively common but not taught in most med schools took me three years and 23 doctors before I got diagnosed, even though diagnosis is based on fairly simple clinical observations.
“Hello, my colleague and I have discovered two new types of Lymphoma, and we would like to register them.”
“Certainly! Tell me your name, please.”
“Well, I’m Dr. Hodgkins.”
"Great, so we’ll call one ‘Hodgkin’s Lymphoma’. What’s the other doctor’s name? ".
“Dr. Ottovordemgentschenfelde.”
“…OK, ‘Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma’. Done!”
I would like to name my very rare disease “a very rare disease”. It’s what Abbott and Costello would do
More realistically:
- Patient: “Doctor, I got shot in the chest.”
- Doctor: “Have you considered it might be anxiety?”
- Patient: “WTF are you talking about? Look, I’m bleeding out all over the floor here.”
- Doctor: “You’d be surprised what anxiety can do.”
- Patient: “Doc, I’m dying from A GUNSHOT WOUND.”
- Doctor: “Ang. Zai. Eh. Tee. Kthxbye.”
Patient: “Doctor, I got shot in the chest.”
Doctor: “What, do you think we like healthcare CEOs because we’re doctors? Rest in piss bozo”
Patient: *dies*
